Just Another Mary Bennett

How many of you have read Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, or at least seen one of the many movie versions of it? You may be tempted to dismiss it because, after all, it was written roughly two hundred years ago; how could anyone truly identify with characters whose lives are so drastically different from our own modern ones? In my opinion that's what is so amazing about this story--I think that every girl in existence can strongly identify with one of the main characters of the story. And that is what I'm going to write about today.

In case you haven't read the book or seen one of the movie adaptations, the story revolves somewhat around the romantic adventures (or misadventures) of a young lady named Elizabeth Bennett. Elizabeth is the second out of five daughters, and we see glimpses into the lives and romatic escapades (or lack thereof) of each. In my observations of myself and other people, it seems to me that nearly every girl falls into one of these five categories.

The first is Jane Bennett. Jane is the eldest of the Bennett girls. She is pretty, kind, quiet, meek, wanting only to see the good in other people and be the peacemaker. She is every guy's dream--a hot wife who will love him unconditionally and completely let him rule the roost without any argument at all. She may weep privately if a guy dumps her, but she will still put forth a good face and somehow never lose hope for him. The modern Janes are good-looking girls (who don't know it or at least don't act like it) who are quiet and kind, always trying to be Christlike, who guys always seem to flock to, mainly for their beauty, but also because they will let the guy take complete control of the relationship.

The second daughter is Elizabeth. Lizzie is pretty, like her older sister Jane, but unlike Jane, Lizzie is opinionated, will not be cowed down by a man, and will freely speak her mind when she feels that it is necessary. Many guys think she is their dream girl because she'll make one hot wife, but when they realize that she actually has her own personality and thinks for herself they back off a bit, even if it is only temporarily. Modern Lizzies are good-looking girls (who, like Janes, don't know they're good-looking or at else don't act like it), but they are not necessarily quiet, have their own thoughts and ideas that you had better pay attention to, and while they would like to see the good in someone, if they have a problem with someone or there is an issue that needs to be addressed, they will not remain quiet about it. Guys flock to these girls as well, mainly for their beauty, until they realize that the girl has a strong personality and will not let them take complete control of the relationship. They may back off for awhile, but like I said, it's usually only temporary--they will soon realize that they are inexplicably turned on by a fiery personality, and so they come running back.

The third (and middle) daughter is Mary. Unlike her other four sisters, Mary is plain. I mean, she's not grotesque or anything, but she's not pretty. And since beauty (or "hotness") is the only thing guys really care about, she is often left out in the cold. She realizes that she will never attract a guy simply with her good looks, so she focuses her time on other pursuits--mainly reading books, studying music (particularly the piano), and doing church service. Guys do not flock to her, even if, like in the case of a certain Mr. Collins, she is absolutely perfect for them. Mr. Collins is mostly interested in church work and reading books, and is looking for a wife to run his household, and his personality meshes perfectly with Mary's, in my opinion. But she is plain, so he does not even consider her, but instead focuses on Jane and then finally proposing to Elizabeth. So Mary recedes into herself, playing her piano to try to impress people or reading her books for her own personal enjoyment. Modern Marys are not "hot," or even "decent looking." They do not fit the world's version of what a woman should look like (through no fault of their own). They try to develop other talents and interests in their lives, such as (but not necessarily) reading, music, church service, etc. But in the end it is not enough and they are alone, and it often leaves them somewhat bitter.

The fourth daugher is Kitty (short for Catherine). Kitty is good looking, and she is somehow completely dominated by her younger sister, Lydia. Kitty does everything Lydia does. She is definitely a follower, not a leader. She spends her time prettying herself up and chasing after boys. Modern Kittys are good-looking, and unlike Janes and Elizabeths, they know it, and they act like it. They are often overly vain and silly. They try as hard as they can to follow the current trends and do what other people tell them to in order to be popular. They are not necessarily troublemakers themselves, but often get into trouble because of the people they associate with.

The youngest daughter is the aforementioned Lydia. Lydia is very pretty and also extremely vain and silly. She spends all of her waking moments chasing after boys with Kitty in tow (much to the chagrin of the older girls). She will do anything to get a man, and she nearly ruins herself and her family in the process. Modern Lydias are good-looking, like Kitty, and they definitely put on airs about it. They are also overly vain and silly. Their lives revolve completely around makeup, clothes, and boys. Many of them also enjoy having a little flunky or two like Kitty who will follow them around and emulate them, and who will try to cover for them when they get into trouble. Which they will inevitably do. They are often troublemakers, and will do ANYTHING to get a man and keep him trapped. Even after they've pretty much ruined their lives, they don't even realize it because once they have caught a man, their lives then revolve completely around makeup, clothes, and showing off their boys.

So let's skip to the very end of the book. Lydia has gotten herself into trouble by running off with Mr. Wickham, a man of very questionable character who has taken advantage of at least one girl in the past. He gets her to come with him by telling her he will marry her (although he doesn't really intend to), which means that not only will Lydia be ruined for sleeping with a man out of wedlock, her entire family will be ruined. But luckily Mr. Darcy intercedes, out of his secret love for Elizabeth, and makes sure that Wickham does in fact marry Lydia.

Jane and Elizabeth endure a lot of continual excitement followed by many letdowns because of their stupid but lovable men of interest. It seems for awhile like they will not end up with the men of their dreams after all, but finally they attain happiness, as Jane and Elizabeth marry Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy, respectively, in a lavish double wedding.

Kitty has somewhat settled down by the end of the book since she is no longer under the direct influence of Lydia. Yet she knows that her good looks will take her far, and at the end she moves away to live a life of excitement and fun (all within the bounds of what is proper, of course), with her relatives in the city.

Which leaves poor Mary the only daughter left at home. She is an adult woman who still lives with her parents because she has nothing else to do. She spends her time reading books, playing the piano, and giving service in the church, hoping in her heart that somewhere there will be a guy who will appreciate these things and eventually learn to appreciate and love her, but in the end, being plain as she is, she is left with the knowledge that what guys go for she hasn't got, and what she has got, guys don't go for. Not even her own parents really appreciate her but rather see her as a burden and, deep in their hearts (although they would deny it adamently) as an embarrassment.

Which is the predicament I find myself in. I am a modern Mary Bennett. I feel like I do have talents and interests, which I try to develop, but in the end, I am plain, and thus undesirable. So I am stuck here, living alone with my parents and family. And I don't see it changing anytime soon.

So my call to the rest of you is to figure out who you are. Are you a Jane, an Elizabeth, a Mary, a Kitty, or a Lydia? In the end, I am just another Mary Bennett.